Chapter 11- From October 14, 2008

Well, today was an early day, we entered the Wu Gorge, and took tons of pictures on the Yangtze River. Breakfast was early, and then we got off the ship at Wushan, and took a smaller watercraft to visit some lesser gorges. Of course, the boat left at 8:30 a.m. and the Empress and To Wong Foo needed to have a cigarette before we left. TWF came up to me and said to tell the guide that they were coming that they were going to be a little late. I smiled, and hoped they would miss it.

The boat ride to the lesser gorges was interesting. There were three of the lesser gorges, the Dragon’s Gate Gorge, the Misty Gorge, and the Emerald Gorge. All three were on a tributary of the Yangtze River, called the Daling River. The river was a jade green, and against the rocks, it was spectacular, and it didn’t have as much pollution.

That’s the one thing that’s very disturbing about the river: the pollution. It’s not like ordinary pollution, but rather like shoes, clothing, a dead pig (or dog…I’m hoping it was the pig), etc. Anyhow, we then hopped on an even smaller sampan, and went up some of the even smaller gorges. This truly was where mom needed her Esther Williams’ swim cap, her nose plug, and her water wings. We all had to wear life vests, and mom about wet herself when she saw me put it on, because I think it was a child’s size life vest. I was laughing because the Empress was trying it on like a hoodie (I think she was shitfaced this morning) and got it stuck on her head.
To Wong Foo wanted me to grab a life vest for him, and I told him that there were lots to choose from and he should just help himself. I ain’t no damn servant…

We then got back to the ship at about noon, and had lunch. We then were able to learn about kite making and flying, mom got to learn a little about watercolor, calligraphy, and embroidery. We then headed through the third of the three gorges on the Yangtze, which was the Qutong Gorge. After seeing two sets, it looks like the same to me. I think I have about 75 pictures of gorges. But it was great.

We then learned how to play mahjong (chinese style) which was a lot of fun, and a lot like gin rummy. I kicked so much ass, it was stupid!

We then were able to take advantage of the drink special, which was the Singapore Sling. I really liked them. They contained lots of booze. One of which was gin. And I like gin.
We had a great dinner, and then saw a cabaret show afterward. It was cool. Thank god no one snuck my name in to have to play something, or that I got called onto the floor for some of the audience participation numbers. I truly have a phobia about that, almost as much as I like having my picture being taken, or me being on television. They’re taking a video while on this cruise, and wow…where’s Jenny Craig when you need her. That’s the first thing I’m doing when I get back home: going on Jenny Craig.

We have a full day tomorrow again, where we visit the ghost city of Fengdu, and have some other activities, before spending our last night on the ship before heading to Xian. It’s been fantastic weather so far, about 82 today and again sunny. It was fantastic.